It all boils down to this, deer hunters of all types need to be in our prayers.
It was deer hunting season in Minnesota a few years ago. Unfortunately, one man on Smoky Hollow lake had an idea that did not play out as well as he had wanted. Oversimplified, he got the idea that he should rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it some corn for a month or so, and then have it butchered so he could have some deer steaks and jerky. Misguided, yes but he thought it was the more humane way to hunt.
The first step in this adventure unfolded as the man - we'll call him Ken, figured that since deer congregate at his neighbor's feeder and do not seem to have much fear of him when he walked outside - that it would not be difficult to rope one. His plan, once a deer was roped, was that he would get up close to it, toss a bag over its head (to calm it down), then hog-tie it and drag it over and into the pen he had built by his pole barn (and yes you are already shaking your head but keep reading).
His plan was put into action, he put some corn in the back yard and with his rope, he hid by the side of the his lake side deck. After about 40 minutes or so, three deer came up slowly. He picked out the medium sized one because it looked just right. He then stepped out from the side of the deck and threw his rope. Yes his throw was accurate but the deer just stood there and stared at Ken.
He wrapped the rope around his waist and held on tight (and thought, this will be easy). That deer still just stood there and stared at him, but he could tell the deer was only mildly concerned about the whole rope situation. Ken took a step towards it.... it took a step away. He put a little tension on the rope, and then received an education that he was not expecting.
The first thing that Ken learned was that while a deer may just stand there and look at you funny while you rope it, don't be surprised when they then spur into action when you start pulling on that rope. Lets just say that deer EXPLODED. The second thing Ken learned was that... pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a big dog or one of his sons at that weight. He thought he could just pull it down with a rope. Unfortunately with a deer -- he had no chance.
That beast then bucked, twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked Ken off his feet and started dragging him across the ground, it occurred to Ken that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as he had originally imagined. The third thing he learned (the only upside)... is that deer do not have as much stamina as many other animals. A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk him off his feet and drag him around when Ken was then able to get back up on his feet. Yes it took Ken a few minutes to realize this, since the blood flowing out of the big gash in his head mostly blinded him. At that point, Ken had lost his taste for corn-fed venison. he just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope. Ken figured that if he just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would get hurt and likely die a slow and painful death somewhere.
Although at the time, there was no love at all between that deer and Ken; at that moment he hated the thing, and he would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual. Despite the gash in his head and the several large abrasions Ken had from being dragged around a bit, he thought he had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by spreading out his body as best he could while the demon deer dragged him about. He could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that he shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in. Ken didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death (and himself as well), so he managed to get the deer lined back up in between his truck and the feeder -- a little trap he had set before hand, just in case -- kind of like a squeeze chute. Although dazed but with renewed confidence, Ken got the deer to back in there and then he started moving up so he could get my (I mean his) rope back. Success as so close but yet still so far, far away.
The fourth thing Ken learned.... did you know that deer bite? They do! He never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so Ken was very surprised when he reached up there to grab that rope and then the deer grabbed hold of his wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head, almost like a pitbull. They bite HARD and it hurts. Ken thought at that the proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. Ken unfortunately was screaming and shaking instead.
Yes Ken's method was ineffective. It seemed like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds. Ken, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it. While he kept it busy by letting it tear the bejebers out of his right arm, Ken reached up with his left hand and pulled the rope loose. That was when Ken got his fifth lesson in deer behavior for the day.... deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet, strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp. He learned a long time ago that when an animal, like a horse... strikes at you with their hooves and you cannot get away easily. The best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.
Sadly for Ken, this was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, Ken devised a different strategy -- he screamed like a girl and tried to turn and run (oh and adding to his predicament, he sees his wife - we'll call her Sally, in the house looking out the window at him... and she is laughing). Now the reason Ken had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head.
Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil... because the second Ken turned to run, it hit him right in the back of the head and knocked him down.
Now Ken's sixth and final lesson learned.... when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, know that it does not immediately leave. Ken suspected that it did not recognize that the danger had passed. Ken was unfortunate to find that what they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head. It was at this time that wisdom caught up with Ken and he finally managed to crawl under his pickup truck and the deer went away in triumph.
As Ken laid there, totally defeated he realized why when people go deer hunting, they bring a rifle with a scope.... so that they can be somewhat equal to the prey.
So rumor has it, Ken gave up deer hunting and now is a mouse hunter for the Narrows Community Church. His wife Sally works as best she can to keep him from his "good ideas". We only ask that you say prayers for all the deer hunters and that they stay safe (especially for the not so bright ones).